A Magnificent Consignment in Dr. Tarrec's Mail

My strange friend, Dr. Tarrec, receives the strangest spam mail – actually delivered to his post office box. (Dr. Tarrec does not trust computers, refuses to set up an email address.)

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I am Michael Kojo from Liberia, but presently living in Gambia. I am writing to seek your help and cooperation to help me retrieve a valuable consignment which contains much money and is sealed within a trunk box locked within a deep security vault. A government emissary named Mr. Hamid Hassan agreed to act as courier for forward delivery of this consignment into your country but Mr. Hamid Hassan disappoints us again and again with his greediness. 

This is because Mr. Hamid Hassan is an unwitting agent of the secret ruling elite – who know very well that the inflammatory rhetoric being propagated within the media will cause rain not to fall.  They are the ones responsible for the drought in California. He limps to the podium to make an announcement – a prophecy of future disasters on American soil, but is altogether unaware of what he is saying and doing.

20% of the consignment ($5.5 Million US Dollars, Twelve 57 lbs. gold bars, and four vials of gold dust, plus 1,500 three carat diamond stones) was destroyed in a preemptive, first strike, atomic blast.  But the members of the news media continually fail to ask the appropriate questions. They refuse to look into the destruction that provoked this attack.

This is why I need your help. Please, if you can assist/help us retrieve the remainder of the consignment box from that duplicitous diplomat, Mr. Hamid Hassan, we will be very happy to compensate you with 25% of the total sum. 

I will provide you the contact details for the delivery and a disposable phone so that you can speak with directly with delivery services and take immediate delivery of this valuable consignment box. Please, I also need an experienced person like yourself to assist us set up and to develop a good investment project that will yield extraordinary profit.

This we must do in order to complete our education. I am expecting your urgent response. Your maximum cooperation is highly needed. The Smoke of Satan must not obscure this transaction.IF you should fail to respond to this letter I will see that you are cursed, and that you eat dust all the days of your life.I will arrange for the National Guard to crush your head, even as you strike at their heavy booted heels.

Thank you and God bless, 

Michael Kojo & Haddy 

P.S. Haddy is my Russian Borzoi.  She sends her regards.\